Tips on seducing / picking up Montreal girls by Dr. Smooth

Updated on the 1st and 15 th of every month

by Dr. Smooth

“Hey doctor Smooth, how do I pick up a girl?” “Well, you lift with your legs and not with your back!”

Does that help? I mean, who would want to live the rest of their life with chronic lower lumbar region pain? Certainly, I wouldn’t!

Basically, if you find yourself asking this type of question, the answer is quite clear: you won’t get the girl! This is because, clearly, if you had a chance, then you wouldn’t be standing in front of me with your hands in your pockets and a sparkle of pathetic hope shimmering in your eyes, thinking that the bullshit that is to come out of my mouth will GET you the girl.

This article will focus on something called, clear signs that you’re going to fail, but can’t come to terms with it. So if you are about to ask the subsequent questions, don’t bother, I’ve provided an answer for you.

“Do you think she likes me?” The answer is “If you don’t know, then how am I, who doesn’t even talk to her, supposed to know this clandestine information.” But I can imagine with a high probability that she doesn’t!
“Do I look fat in these (insert light, tight clothing here)?” The answer to this loaded-gun-like-question is “Yup!” Shoot yourself in the foot, why not, if you do it once, then I promise they won’t ask you again. Perks of being callous.
“Is this place cool?” The answer, “Nope, I enjoy going to loser places, which is why I’m taking you; you’ll be a shoe in with the other losers!”
“Did you cum?” The answer is “Noooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!” If she did, then your back would be bleeding.
“Is that an anaconda in your pants, or are you stuffing again?” The answer, “Neither baby, but whatever it is, it will choke you like an anaconda.”
“Are those real?” The answer, “Yup, they’re real implants.”